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I’m Ready to Get Divorced. What Do I Need to Do Next?


When you got married, you probably expected your relationship to last for the rest of your life. Unfortunately, relationships can break down for a variety of reasons. You may have found that you and your spouse disagree about how to manage your finances, how your children will be raised, or any number of other issues, leading to ongoing arguments and conflicts that have become impossible to resolve. Your decision to pursue a divorce may be based on specific problems in your marriage, such as infidelity, or you and your spouse may simply have grown apart and are no longer happy in your relationship.

Regardless of the reason why your marriage is coming to an end, you will want to make sure to take the right steps as you proceed with the divorce process. Your first priority should be to hire a divorce attorney. A skilled and experienced divorce lawyer can help you understand the legal issues involved in your divorce, and they can provide you with representation to help you achieve an outcome that will allow you to move on successfully once the divorce process is complete.

Getting Ready for Divorce

Before you begin the divorce process, it is a good idea to sit down and think through your plans. By considering what you want your life to look like once your marriage has ended, you can set achievable goals and begin taking steps toward making the changes that will come with your divorce.

Some of the issues that you will want to consider include your finances and your living situation. Do you earn enough income to be able to support yourself, or do you rely on your spouse’s income to meet your family’s needs? Will you be moving to a new residence, or do you expect to continue living in your family’s home? By understanding the income you earn and the regular expenses that you will need to cover, you will be able to make realistic plans and create a budget that will allow you to live comfortably. By doing so, you can also determine whether you can ask for your spouse to pay you financial support or whether you may be required to pay spousal support.

If you and your spouse have children together, you will also need to address how the two of you will share in the responsibility of raising them, and you will need to determine where they will live most of the time. Do you expect to have primary custody of your children, or will you and your spouse share custody? Will you be able to work out an arrangement in which your children live primarily at one parent’s home, or will they spend equal amounts of time with each parent? Even if you are not able to discuss these issues with your spouse, you can think about how you believe these issues should be handled, and you can prepare to address them during the divorce process.

Gathering Information

Once you have a good understanding of your goals for your divorce, you can start making more concrete plans for the divorce process by obtaining all the necessary information about your finances and property. Since all of the assets and debts you and your spouse own will need to be divided between the two of you, gaining a full understanding of your family’s finances can ensure that these matters are handled correctly.

The financial information you will need to gather includes anything that describes what you earn, what you own, and what you owe. All sources of income for you and your spouse should be considered, and you will want to make a full accounting of all of the marital property that you own together, as well as any non-marital property owned by either spouse. Finally, you will need to gather all applicable information about any debts that you owe, including credit cards, home mortgages, or auto loans.

While you may not be able to access all of the information needed, gathering as much information as possible before beginning the divorce process can help you prepare to address the issues that you will need to resolve. Understanding the monetary value of your assets can ensure that you will be able to divide this property fairly, and knowing the amount of income you and your spouse earn can help you prepare to address issues such as child support or spousal maintenance.

In addition to financial information, you may also want to begin compiling information that may be necessary when addressing child custody issues. If you expect to have primary custody of your children, you may want to obtain their medical records or school records to show that you have played an important role in making decisions about how they have been raised. You may also wish to make notes showing when you provide care for your children or participate in their activities, while recording any other information that shows that you are closely involved in their lives.

Filing for Divorce

Once you are fully ready to go ahead with your divorce, you can begin the process of dissolving your marriage by filing a petition for divorce in court. Depending on the state where you live, your petition may state the grounds for divorce, or the reason(s) you wish to end your marriage. While some states allow fault-based grounds for divorce, such as infidelity or abandonment, most states allow for “no-fault” divorce. In these cases, your divorce petition will simply state that you and your spouse have irreconcilable differences that have caused your marriage to break down beyond repair.

Your divorce petition will also include requests for temporary relief in which you will ask for decisions to be made about how certain matters will be handled during the divorce process. For example, you may request that you have exclusive use of your marital home, that your children will live primarily with you, or that your spouse pay you child support or spousal support. After your spouse has filed a response to your divorce petition, the judge in your case may grant some or all of your requests, depending on what they believe is the appropriate way to handle these matters while your divorce is pending.

By considering all of these issues and taking steps to file your divorce petition properly, you can be better prepared to move forward with the process of ending your marriage. Working with a skilled family law attorney will ensure that you have considered all of the legal and financial aspects of your divorce, and your divorce lawyer can advocate for your interests and help achieve your goals as you prepare to move on to the next stage of your life.


About author: Steven H. Mevorah is the founder of Mevorah Law Offices LLC and began his practice in 1979. Mr. Mevorah brings significant experience to bear in achieving positive results for his clients. With offices in Lombard, Bloomingdale, Chicago, and Naperville, Mr. Mevorah makes his practice accessible to all of those in need throughout the Chicagoland area and surrounding counties.

What is the importance of hobbies and sports for kids post-divorce

What is the importance of hobbies and sports for kids post-divorce

It is very significant that you urge your kids to take an interest in recreational activities. It gives them a way to channel their energies in a positive way. According to studies, it is shown that kids spending time on hobbies and sports were more physically and mentally fit.

Life of kids post-divorce


There is no doubt that separation can, in any case, be a very hard time for kids. They feel confused and vulnerable. They don’t understand things the way adults do. So, they can’t process their thoughts about what is happening between their parents. You need to help them in order to control their thoughts. Instead of giving them free time to think of this sort of stuff. It is best to find some cool hobbies and sports for them. This way, they can spend their time in a productive way.

Creating a routine post-divorce is good for the kid

If you are fighting for custody of your child, it is best that you take care of them in an excellent manner. Try to make a routine for them and manage how they spend their time all day. Keep in mind that custody lawyers observe the behavior of kids and check how much time they are spending on the grounds exploring new hobbies and sports. If your kid is good at sports and is interested in playing and spending time on the field it will put a very positive image of you in front of the lawyers. They will know that you are trying to provide a balanced life to your kids.

When they will ask you about your kids and you will tell them that you have made a proper schedule for them and have added activities for fun and learning, they will know right away that you are a good parent, trying your best to give your kids a good life. This will have a very positive image of yours and they will not hesitate in providing you the custody of your kids.

Why are sports and hobbies for kids are important

Since you love your kid and care about their progress, you need to do whatever you can to help them grow in a healthy way. If you see your kids are getting affected by your divorce, this is when you need to introduce them to new hobbies and sports.

Kids after separation often get pulled in different directions. While their parents fight for custody, the kids feel lost. This is the time when these kids need someone to help them get out of their zone. If during this time you introduce them to a good and interesting sport, it will be very beneficial for them. It will give a new kind of strength and confidence to your kids. Kids will know that they are not wasting their time anymore. Instead, they are using it in something they are actually interested in and they have a good time.

How to guide your kids through the process of your divorce

How to guide your kids through the process of divorce

In case you are experiencing the divorce procedure, you need to guide your kids properly about what is happening. Their minds are young and can’t comprehend difficult situations like this, so it is your duty to make them understand what is going on.

As we all know that divorce can be a troublesome time for everybody, but when it comes to kids it is way harder than you can imagine. But it doesn’t mean that you can’t manage your children when you are going through a divorce. Kids are innocent but smart, when we try to tell them stuff, they really listen and understand. So as a parent, it will be your duty to make them understand the process of divorce in a way that they don’t feel sad about it. Let’s dig deep into,  how to guide your kids through a divorce?

Tell kids what is happening

As mentioned earlier, kids nowadays are very smart. They understand when something is wrong. The only thing you need to take care of is that they don’t get any wrong information. It is best that you talk to them about your situation and guide them in the best possible way. Tell them that even times are tough, they will be fine and come out of this stronger and better. If you will hesitate to open up in front of your kids, they might ask around and get the wrong sort of information so be careful about this.

Limit kids exposure to stressful conditions

Perhaps the best thing you can do is limit your kid’s exposure to unpleasant circumstances like fights between you and your spouse. These sorts of circumstances can be very upsetting for children and seeing their parents being like that can leave a mark in their minds forever.

Listen to what your kids have to say

Now that you have played your part in telling them about your situation, it is time to listen. Talk to your kids and ask them to share their feelings with you. It is up to you to judge them how they are feeling and try to make them happy and content. If they have any doubts in their mind, try to clear them out so that they don’t stay confused.

In case your kids are sad and upset about the entire divorce thing, let them cry. Tell them that their emotions are valid and they are not wrong for feeling this way.

Take care of your own self

Although it is important to give a maximum of your time to your kids. Especially during the process of divorce, it is hard for them and you really need to be there when your kids need you the most but make sure that you are taking at least a few hours of your day entirely for yourself. As this situation is hard for you too, so you need to be ready for this. Don’t let this hard time destroy your mental health because your kid’s wellbeing depends upon you. You can only take care of your kids well if you yourself are fine and happy in your life.

4 best things to consider while starting an online divorce mediation

divorce mediation

Are you in confusion about your marital relationship? If you want to give a chance to your relationship, then you must focus on taking divorce mediation sessions. Do you know about a divorce mediation process? It is a method in which you take the help of the mediator and he will help you resolve your issues. It is a voluntary way, for your spouse and you to resolve divorce problems together without litigation. Before the COVID-19 pandemic, mediators take the sessions in their offices. But, these days, due to the lockdown, these sessions are held online.

This process is becoming popular and if you are thinking to begin with this method, then you must consider some factors.

Who is your divorce mediator?

So, you have decided to give one more chance to your relationship. It is good for you and your family, especially when you have kids. If you are going to conduct your divorce mediation session online, then it is a good idea because you have the option to choose a certified and licensed mediator online. So, you can browse online for the reputed and successful mediators. No doubt, this is a voluntary process that must keep both of you comfortable.

Will you attend the divorce mediation together?

If both of you are living separately, then you have to take the divorce mediation session alone. For the partners, living in the same residence is a choice to attend alone or together. Your mediator will ask some questions and these will be helpful for both of you to answer. Moreover, you can discuss with your mediator about this factor. He will guide you on which choice will be suitable for you. In this process, you will have to answer some questions and explain your issues.

What will be the Payment method?

These days, due to the online sessions, mediators facilitate their clients. The different mediators charge their clients in different ways. Today, due to modern technology, modern and reputed clinics use a variety of ways to accommodate their clients. They use the payment methodology that contains these characteristics. The best clinic helps you to save your time and money to make the payment from the bank due to their modern payment method.

They use debit and credit card machines. Clients can make their payments via cards. You will never be in a problem that their system is out of order or not working. All their card machines, including Business Debit Card Machines, are available with a plug and play innovation. This is sure to make it simple to get a start. In this way, you will not have the issue or any delay in the payment.

Offers support for consultation

During the divorce mediation process, a person needs emotional support. So, you must confirm that your mediator is available for your issues off and on. The dedicated team of the doctors always there to help you and provide you support. They help you in solving your issues.

How to introduce your new love to your kids after a divorce?

introduce your new love to your kids

So, you are going to take a new start after divorce. It is great for you but it can be a difficult thing to handle if you have kids, especially toddlers. Similarly, the matter becomes harder if your children are in a teenager. But you have to introduce your new love to your kids.

The divorce between parents is a shocking incident for kids. Some children do not accept it because it is meaningless for children or toddlers. It is one of the most difficult topics to broach with toddlers. For divorces, this is impossible to explain to them when you struggle with your grief. For the toddlers, it is vital to understand it and get the ways to express their feelings naturally. If you are coming to life after this incident, then you need to explain it to your children. Some of the important ways to introduce your new love to your kids are here.

Explain to them about your divorce

Taking your kids in confidence is a good idea. You must sit with them and explain to them about this condition which you and they are facing, post-divorce. It is not normal for them to accept that they are separated and now you are going to bring a new person in their life. May, be they will express their sorrow in the bite-sized chunks. Sometimes children do not like anyone who comes to their family and they react very seriously because of their sensitive nature. This situation can leave a bad impact on their mind. To avoid this situation, make them sure that they will not be insecure in the future. You must prepare them for this situation and then, introduce your new love to your kids.

Do not dodge their questions

It is vital to prepare your child for this concept. You need to choose the correct words to make your child’s mind to introduce your new love to your kids. If your preschooler is harsh, then it is normal. If your child is not emotional, then it is one of the good opportunities. Take him with you on the ground walk and help your child to explain that he has lost someone dear to him and now he will get a new friend as a family member.  Maybe, he will ask some questions. Reply to these questions as lightly as you can. Explain to him by telling the stories of the children. This situation sometimes frightens the child. They do not want to leave the companionship and do not accept a new person. You need to provide emotional support.

Reply simply and briefly

Toddlers have no sense to handle too much information. It is vital to guide them appropriately. It is useful to explain about the new relationship and its support in life. Guide them that the new person will be supportive of their family members and they will be able to live a happier life. He will not feel any pain. You need to welcome that new person in the family. In this way, children learn how to accept new relationships.

Express your emotions

Sadness is an important part of divorce for adults and children. Avoid using words that can frighten children when you are going to introduce your new love to your kids. The excessive grief, mourn and sadness can create depression and fear in children. You need to handle the children as per their sensitivity level. They know about the mood changes and environment that is not suitable for their fun.

How to stay active even after the divorce? 5 simple Tips.

stay active even after the divorce

So, you have met the most painful incident of your life. Divorce is highly hard to manage. Most of the people face health deterioration because it brings about several changes in your life. People face problems in financial matters and many other issues. Staying active after divorce is not easy for everyone since the tolerance level of everyone is different. So, people want to avoid meeting others. They do not want to be social and they avoid all social activities. On the other hand, they face the problem of depression and mental stress as well.

There are things you can deal with divorce in a healthy way. To get rid of this tension and trauma, you need to take care of your mental, emotional, and physical health. It is one of the most important things that you must try for Staying active after divorce. There are many ways through which you can be able to come out of the divorce.

Take training for strength

Training for strength is very important for Staying active after divorce. It is vital to start from low to high. By doing this, you need to build physical and mental strength and this strategy will improve your condition because the human brain starts producing a chemical that makes them happy.

For men, building muscles is a good choice. To build muscles, high-reps are good. It provides strength to connective tissues. Follow these ways to do workout during training.

  • Four sets of ten repetitions.
  • Between sets, he took 60-90 seconds rest.
  • Tempo: 1 second up, without pause in the bottom, and 3 seconds down.

After, getting stronger, it becomes easier to increase loads. Take a start from 1-6 reps. This factor is significant for choosing weight; you can do eight to twelve reps for muscle building.

Join a counseling session

It will help you attaining peace of mind. A qualified psychologist will help you discover much better ways to connect with your mate and avoid fights until they get violent. With those skills, you would be able to communicate clearly without becoming furious to others. It would help if you told your relatives, peers, and kids whatever you want, or what you may not want. These skills can also enable you to avoid thinking about uncomfortable issues like parental decisions.

Take suggestion from a mentor

A mentor can be your friend or any relative. Your mentor helps in building a healthy relationship with your kids, friends, colleagues, and others. An effective and healthy discussion with your mentor also allows exchanging further joy and fun you’re your family members. In these discussions, you can begin to understand how to take care of your relationships. In this way, you will be able to manage small factors that can take you closer to your family members.

Avoid taking caffeine

People who are facing this mental trauma, they start taking coffee and tea to tackle their stress. It is not a healthy way to get rid of this issue. You must prefer to take juices and smoothies. This is a much healthy diet that provides you with stamina and courage to bear it and to come towards life.

Stay motivated

If you are feeling low and depress, then you must try to come out of this trauma. It can help if you have issues with your relationship, such as feeling depressed and being in an unhealthy relationship with your family members. A good relationship has the potential to enhance your life and create real happiness. Yet nuanced topics such as age, co-parenting, or good interaction can create all the differences.

Stay active even after the divorce | Final words

Are you struggling for Staying active after divorce? Your positive thinking and creative approach will allow you to learn much about how and why these problems frequently reach a stage of the crisis. It can assist you in understanding the complex aspect of human interactions. These are not fast or straightforward treatments, but it has been recreated by several couples that have put in the effort themselves and one another.

What are the things to do to deal with divorce the healthy way?

what are the things to do to deal with divorce the healthy way

A divorce is one of the emotional and stressful experiences in life. Whatever, the reason for the split and whether you need it or not, the breakup of a relationship can turn your world upside down and trigger all types of unsettling and painful emotions. Romantic relationships start on a high note of hopes and excitement for the future. When a relationship fails, everyone experiences grief, stress, and disappointment. Coping with the breakup or divorce is not easy for everyone. It is obvious that when a relationship ends its healing takes time. Most of the people suffer from anxiety, stress, and depression after this sad incident. They do not find the way how to deal with divorce. So, they need to follow some healthy tips that can help them grieve their loss and start to move on. Some of the important tips are given below.

Take care of your health

You know you are experiencing the most tragic phase of your life to date. So, you need to learn to deal with divorce. This is depressing and due to some emotional health and physical health weaknesses, you are disturbed these days. This mental disturbance can leave a negative impact on your body’s well-being. You need to follow some good ways in which eating a healthy, balanced, and nutritious diet is highly important for you. You should include some fresh produce and lean protein. In this time, you must avoid taking caffeine in the form of tea and coffee. You should avoid foods that contain refined carbs and high in sugar. It leads to poor mood and mood swings.

Try a supplement

For those who are struggling to cope with divorce are dealing with mental pressure and physical fatigue. So, avoid this situation, you need to try a supplement. It boosts mood and nutrient intake. In this way, you can deal with divorce. Doing exercise and proper diet are two important sources to help you cope with this situation. Working out will help you staying in shape as well as maintaining the right balance of hormones. You will be able to avoid a bad mood. It increases serotonin and happiness hormones. These steps are ideal to help you avoid depression and other mental problems.

It protects body cells against damage due to free radicals. It helps the human body fighting oxidative stress and other toxins. This cellular damage leads to cancer, infertility, and aging. It secures the human body from oxidative damage. This procedure takes place in the reproductive system, digestive system, brain, bone marrow, and eyes. Nourishing your skin and gives the lively feel are the prime benefits of using supplements. It invigorates the skin and furnishes energy with the overwhelming store of supplements including vitamins C, E, and A. These are numerous. It helps in controlling the toxic material and in addition cholesterol level. It makes you vivacious by metabolizing your body.  It actuates the digestive system and devouring fats also.

Complete your sleep

Due to tension, most of the people cannot sleep in this situation. Poor sleep or no sleep in the night can make you seriously sick. To avoid this condition, you need to take proper sleep at night. Do not sleep late in the morning or day time because it causes depression and sadness. So, you must prepare your body and mind to deal with divorce.

Do not use sleeping pills and tranquilizers

To get rid of stress and to deal with divorce, most of the people take sleeping pills or other relaxants. You must not take these drugs because these can be addictive. In the human brain, the Pinal gland produces a natural hormone that is known as Melatonin. Its function is to regulate wakefulness and sleep. It is derived from serotonin, neurotransmitter, and amino acid tryptophan. Its other name if sleep hormone because melatonin treats human sleep disorder. It travels in the human body and influences on different systems of the body. This is the time when you need a melatonin supplement. It has several other health benefits. Instead of sleeping pills, you must use these supplements.

New Love After Divorce: What are you waiting for? It’s all Yours!

love after divorce -

Divorce is a destructive phase that should not come in anyone’s life. But, it happens and very common today. What’s more, we have all invested a great deal of energy thinking, talking, and expounding on the impressive drawbacks.
Be someone recently said to me: It’s not logical, not official, not ensured and, indeed, there are measurements that make a lie out of it. But there is truth IN it and it’s that reality that I’m considering today about love after divorce.
What he said was this: The most joyful couples he knows, as, really glad, are those in second relationships who truly set aside the effort to pick cautiously the second time around; who utilized their first marriage as a reminder, a teaching moment.

Love After Divorce

I began making an inquiry by asking ladies in second-time connections what improved them, or possibly more astute. It’s informal, just episodic data. In any case, it bodes well. What’s more, it offers a ton of expectations.

New guidelines

Everybody I conversed with said something with the impact of “What happens next is anyone’s guess.” In another relationship after an extreme marriage, you get the chance to revise all the standards. In the event that you were detached or felt pushed around in your first marriage, you can begin, directly from the earliest starting point, in another job. You can make the arrangements, get your voice heard, declare whatever it is you couldn’t in your first marriage. On the off chance that you and your first partner couldn’t or didn’t develop and change in perfect manners, discovering another person can be freed from each one of those pieces of yourself you have moved away from, become out of, or basically decided to discharge.

Another mentality

Another topic that surfaced in pretty much every case was depletion, misery, and depression in first relationships that cause change to feel unthinkable. It’s such a great amount of simpler to reexamine yourself in another relationship dynamic. You can evaluate every single better approach for being love after divorce, of being an accomplice, of permitting yourself to be thought about and for holding nothing back from care for somebody in a far more profound way.

Change yourself from within

Anything really is conceivable. In the event that you comprehend what worked and what didn’t previously and you are carefully tuning in to your senses and thinking about what got you in a difficult situation in any case.

I am here to reveal to you that old, midlife mutts can gain proficiency with a wide range of exceptional new relationship stunts. You can be helpless and open without precedent for as long as you can remember. You can get your section back in every single imaginable way, women. I won’t broadly expound here yet I heard a ton A LOT of uplifting news from ladies who rediscovered their sexuality and exotic nature in new connections and love after divorce. They detailed another capacity to make harmony with their blemished bodies just because, well, ever, on the grounds that they were being loved in completely new manners.

This was a shock to me. As indicated by the entirety of the women I conversed with, their new loves after divorce and lives helped them see unmistakably the entirety of the purposeful impediments from their first relationships. All the things you thought expected to happen HAD TO HAPPEN before you felt good (in the event that I lost the infant weight; on the off chance that I had a satisfying activity; re-did the house; lived nearer to my family; lived not even close to my family; got a full lift; understood that degree; had more cash; discovered the perfect get-away spot.

None of that needs to occur. You can actually get a do-over. What’s more, you can decide to get what you need and give what you need.

How To Avoid Expensive Divorce Mistakes in California?

Divorce Mistakes

Getting a divorce is a hectic task and if you are in California, it could be it more expensive. Generally, you may land yourself into trouble if you or your partner are seeking a divorce and don’t have proper planning to avoid the costs related divorce mistakes and make.

Consulting a Family Law & Divorce Law Attorney is one of the major tasks that you need to follow but that can make your divorce an expensive one if you do not deal with precise preparation.  No need to panic though, here is the solution for the divorce mistakes that you might make while planning a divorce.

Can you avoid expensive divorce mistakes?

The answer to this big question is right here, well the vain you get while going through a divorce is cannot be reduced, but all we can do is lessen the burden and avoid expensive divorce mistakes in California.

Keen understanding of an attorney

One of the most costly mistakes generally you can make is understanding all the legal alternatives and various options to file the divorce. Well, it true that all the planning is done by you, however, do not perform the legal actions on your own.

Discuss all the measures with your lawyer and let him do the same as he has the necessary knowledge to resolve the legal issues.

Do not avoid the details

Usually, while going through the larger transformation, you generally forget about the details such as tax consequences of divorce. Your tax will get affected so do not panic as you need to be prepared for the future. Well, divorce involves the division of property and asset and when it is happening in California you need a proper lawyer to deal with your tax and your finances.

Non-disclosure of all the assets

This is one of the practices done very often. It is highly essential to disclose all your assets as the whole system is based on honesty. Now and then the opposition will find out about all your hidden assets so it’s better to reveal it before. According to the law of California, the assets are divided equally among both parties.

Keep it secured

As you learned about the intention of your spouse to get separated, get all your financial document copies with you safely. You will definitely require them. You cannot avoid taking this step, in fact, make it mandatory as you cannot afford to skip this as it is definitely an expensive mistake that can cost you a heavy penalty.

Do not avoid your lawyer’s advice

This mistake is the most often made by numerous people who opt for divorce. Not hearing the advice and recommendation of the lawyer after the procedure has been started and filing has begun. Do not take it lightly, do what they ask you to do. Ask the questions, clear the all doubts your lawyer will answer each of them, they will clear you out what do and what not.

Have a solid command over your emotions

It is really essential to control your emotions. Having baggage of strong emotion is normal while getting a divorce and it becomes heavy in the courtroom during the negotiation. People tend to make mistakes due to emotional reactions all you need is a grip so that you may understand the situation and deal with it accordingly. Losing your temper, getting aggressive, rude comments voicemail and messages, and communicating with bad language can cause trouble.

California’s court parenting rules

The courtroom is very clear from the perspective of parents. If children are involved, you need to prioritize them as they should not suffer because of your personal decision.

The time is tough how divorced parents handle custody and coronavirus and so are you, just make a clear vision about your children and everything will be sorted. Make them feel that there is no change for them, and they will be important to both the parents.


Divorce is itself a hard decision and it becomes tougher when the situation is much more expensive and way out of your budget. The above mention points will help you to avoid the expensive divorce mistakes that can get you in trouble. I wish all the luck that prevails!



About Author: At Land Legal Group our Family Law Lawyer in Los Angeles insists on the specific interests of each of our clients while presenting a family law situation. The choices taken in our law offices will impact the rest of your life, so it’s vital to our family law firm that we find the best result possible for your full family law requirements.

Can the spouses use the same lawyer during their divorce?


You are aware of the fact that divorce involves a lot of money and being one of the important decisions of your life you cannot afford to go wrong with your consulting and preparation as it is the matter of paperwork and documentation. Well, in that case, you generally get the thought of hiring the same lawyer in order to save money. Whether it be family law lawyers or divorce lawyers you think about having the same. Nevertheless, the answer is a pretty clear NO, you cannot hire a mutual lawyer.

First, to finalize your divorce, you’ll need to make decisions based on these five things:

  1. Don’t let anger force you to divorce,
  2. Share your desire to divorce someone you truly trust,
  3. Don’t give up on your marriage until you have done everything you can to fix your problems,
  4. Don’t get involved with anyone else,
  5. Don’t leave an unhappy relationship until you can comfortably take care of yourself.

When you’re sure you want to get the divorce, then you can hire your own lawyer. Here are the reasons for not using the same lawyer for your divorce:

  • The first is quite evident, whenever you hire an attorney you hire it for your work. The attorney is hired specifically to represent you in front of the jury and only for your beneficiary.
  • Professionally it is strictly prohibited for any attorney to take the case from both the parties no matter if they have mutual consent either, the attorney is not allowed at all to take it.
  • The ethics and rules do not all allow any professional to indulge with the clients of the same conflicting interest. As they cannot provide the legal advice as there is no vision for them to take it further in whose interest, and naturally they will prefer doing it for the one who might offer them an extra amount than the other.
  • However, if you and your spouse willingly agree on most of the aspects involved in your divorce you can opt for the mediation. Well, the mediation not necessarily needs to be an attorney. Rather than choosing two different attorneys, you can go for the mediator, however, consulting a mediator who is an attorney is recommendable. As his/her unbiased guidance can help you with the process of the agreeable divorce agreement.
  • Mediator services don’t involve judgment, so his/her work is to get your mutual grounds on paper which is much better than doing it by yourself. Choosing an attorney-mediator can help you out on legal grounds as they are familiar with all the paperwork and process to get a divorce through the agreeable divorce agreement.
  • But if you acquire much knowledge and detailing you need not hire a mediator all you can do is hire an attorney who can complete all your paperwork and you just need to sign the documents and let the attorney represent them in front of the jury, that sounds much easier now! and the attorney will just represent the points on behalf of the one who hired him/her.

Let’s understand the role of mediation with a neutral attorney:

  • They help out the spouses to understand the law.
  • They help out the spouses for all sorts of documentation such as filling out the forms and exchange financial disclosures.
  • They can also help you out to highlight the main issues for you to get the divorce.
  • They help out to generate the agreement with all the clauses and contract points that discussed with mutual consent.
  • They draft the settlement agreement and working on details.


Hiring a single attorney-mediator is a better option as the couple can save money related to the divorce process. But make sure you have the knowledge about all your legal rights, or it can turn out to be costly and unaffordable. Make sure you have all the required knowledge about the agreement you are going have through the mediator or else can lead you into trouble and you don’t want to end things on a bitter note. I wish you all the luck that prevails!



About Author: At The Law Offices of Kyle R. Puro Our attorney is considered amongst the  Long Beach Family Law Attorneys , with her prime focus areas being Family Law including Divorce, Child Custody and Paternity Modifications.  We highly passionate about her cases and understands her clients’ requirements with patience to come up with the most apt solution to embark on their journey to another chapter in their life.